Talking to Your Baby: Why Good Parents Still Miss Words Sometimes

Hi, my name is Jasmine.

I’m a special education teacher who works with children from newborn to five years old. Some of you who read my previous blog—“Three Things” might be thinking:

“What is this lady talking about? Of course I talk to my baby! Is she trying to say I don’t use words or label things?”

Let me be very clear.

As someone who visits children and their families in their homes, I see firsthand that yes—many of you absolutely talk to your children. I see it.

However, I also see something else.

Parents are VERY busy people.

Parents don’t just have to take care of themselves—they also have the responsibility of keeping their child living and breathing. And I will tell you from firsthand experience: that is not an easy task.

Why Parents Respond So Quickly

In my experience, parents sometimes feel that their child must receive their needs and wants immediately, or else something terrible will happen.

After 20 years of working with children, I can confidently say:
No child has ever self-destructed because they didn’t receive milk within 20 seconds.

But when you’re a new parent—or parenting a very young child—you want your child to be comfortable. And let’s be honest:

No one wants to hear a child cry.

I recently spoke with a mom who told me:

“I just don’t want to hear my daughter cry, so I give her something quickly, so she’ll stop.”

That makes sense.

Where Language Gets Missed

Sometimes parents don’t realize that they are not consistently modeling wordsbecause they are so focused on meeting their child’s needs in the moment.

Parents may worry that their child isn’t talking—but most parents are even more concerned that their child has a pulse at the end of the day.

And that’s normal.

What often happens is that we prioritize facilitating needs and wants over modeling words, without even realizing it.

 A Real-Life Example

Many parents tell me:

• “When my child points to a      cookie, I give it to them.”
• Others say, “When my child      points to the cookie, I say the word cookie first.”

And then there are parents who report that they say the word—but when I observe them, I see something different.

True story.

A baby started pointing toward the stroller where a package of cookies was stored. Without missing a beat, the mom stood up, grabbed the package, and literally put the cookie straight into his mouth.

She sat down and looked at me.
I looked at her and smiled.

I didn’t say a word.

She looked confused for a few seconds… and then her face changed.

She smiled and said:

“I didn’t say the word cookie, did I?”

I smiled back and said:

“No, you didn’t.”

And I also told her:
That doesn’t make you a bad mom. It makes you a very normal one.

 The Simple Fix

All I suggested was this:

The next time your baby asks for something—say the one word out loud before giving it to them.

That’s it.

Just one word.
One moment.
One opportunity for your child to hear language before receiving the item.

The Big Takeaway

Communication involves more than just talking.

Talking is a huge part of communication—but we also need to look at how we respondto our child’s attempts to communicate.

As we discussed, children communicate in many ways:

• Pointing
• Pulling
• Reaching
• Giving you an item
• Crying

What I have learned over the years is this:

👉 It is the caregiver’s response to the communication attempt that shapes how the child will communicate in the future.

If you have any questions or comments, please let me know.
If you have a specific concern, feel free to email me at
📧 Jasmine@mjscds.com

Take care! 😉